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Leg Post 62
Leg Post 62 takes place in Sparta, in Ancient Greece, where Zeus, god of Mount Olympus, is investigating the royal palace after he heard of the beauty of the Spartan Queen Leda. He eventually finds her, naked, in her bedroom. She thrust a knife to his neck but when she learns it will do him no harm, she relents but remains aloof. She dresses herself in a toga but Zeus turns on his charms, despite her cold and irritated demeanour. When he tries to touch her, she attacks him in an instant and berates his appearance. He returns in a new form, the very pinnacle of Spartan physique, looking more like Jupiter of the Roman Pantheon. Despite this, she attacks him again and asserts that he did not work for that body and it was, therefore, not attractive. He decides to leave her at last. She later retires to the garden to watch the birds. They are her one guilty pleasure in a life of Spartan frugality and disdain of pleasures. She finds a new, large male swan and hugs it. She realised, quickly, that it is Zeus but admires his trickery. Zeus expected just the hug but she slips off her toga for sex. He doesn't get the chance to turn back into a human and she wants him as a swan, which disturbs Zeus but he isn't going to complain. Seven years later, Leda is exercising when her daughter, Helen of Sparta, asks for the identity of her father. Leda decides to tell no lies and pull no punches and tells her the whole story, which horrifies Helen and she wants to know why her mother didn't just lie to her. Post FEATHERED FRIEND Sparta, to the south of the Grecian mainland, was a land of warm climate and fair skies. But its people were hardened by their philosophy of living a spartan existence – a life of frugality in all things, in wealth and in lifestyle. They were all trained to fight from the earliest age, both men and women, to produce strong and virulent persons. The weak were killed at birth and only the strong survived. Other peoples were subdued to slavery and they even looked down upon their Grecian brethren. Some in Athens admired Sparta immensely, seeing their civilisation as the epitome of what humanity could be, while Athenians themselves embraced luxury and comfort, art and history and pleasures. The women of Sparta were known to be the most fierce in all of Greece and not the meek girls of Athens or Macedonia. And the queen of the land ruled by example to her fellow females. Queen Leda was tall, athletic and stern. Her palace would pale in grandeur when compared to even the manors of Athens, but in this fashion it exemplified the Spartan way. The woman’s brown hair was long but tied back neatly and she wore no makeup. Even the boys of Athens were wearing makeup, but in Sparta the true beauty had to be worn. Yet their ideal beauty was not comparable to the pompous Athenians, they saw beauty not just in the quality of skin or the redness of lips or the length of eyelashes. Beauty was in the many years of hard training to achieve muscle mass. It was in the contours of the body, the firm, tight skin and the dedication shown through the eyes. The willingness to succeed. The willingness to be the best. Zeus, with his rotund belly, walked slowly through the passages of the palace. He found the place dreary and dull. Plain walls of whitewash, orange-tiles floors that could be found in any Grecian home, and the only ornaments to be found were statues of important people with plaques to tell you how they set a fine example to follow. Even the vegetation was planted uniformly, trimmed to exact measurements and they were exclusively vegetables, herbs or fruits – all for use and none for aesthetics. Zeus skulked up the stairs, which he noted had to kind of railing in case of falls. If you fall in Sparta, you deserve to die. He crept along the corridor until he reached the bedrooms. He poked his head through each door, like an apparition, but found nobody there. The royal family of Sparta was dangerously depleted after several deaths in wars with other city states. As his head slipped through the wooden door to Queen Leda’s bedroom he suddenly found a knife to his throat, which was sticking out of the door. He tried to look down at the simple, unimpressive blade. In any other land, it would be an insult to be killed by such a boring weapon. Queen Leda: “Explain yourself, ghost!” Zeus: “Well. I’m not a ghost. Does that help? And if I were a ghost, that knife wouldn’t hurt me, would it?” Queen Leda: “Ah. So you admit this knife will kill you if used!” Zeus: “Oh. Well, actually no. Sorry. I’m Zeus!” He managed to turn his head, still sticking out of the wood, to get a look at his would-be-murderer and discovered her to be completely naked. Her skin was dark and oiled, which showed the details of her muscular abdomen and how tight the skin was around her thighs and buttocks. Her breasts, which drew the lecherous god’s eyes most intently, were large but extremely pert and firm. Her face was beautiful, but in a ‘strict headteacher’ way, not the usual soft and effeminate way Zeus usually pined for. He noticed her nipples were standing up and he tried his best not to lick his lips. Queen Leda: “It’s chilly.” Zeus: “Yes. Yes it is. Do you need me to, ah, warm you up?” Queen Leda: “No. I was exercising and now you’ve interrupted me.” She lowered the knife, resigned that it wouldn’t affect a god, and turned from him. His eyes strolled down her back until they came to a longing stop. He felt his lips pucker up in a wanton kiss. She bent down, which prompted a groan from Zeus, and slipped her toga around her body. Although a complicated process, many years of use and the strict physical regimen of the queen allowed her to be clothed quicker than Zeus could say, ‘Let me help!’. Yet even clothed the woman appeared to be the perfect specimen of human health and fitness. She started to fasten her long hair behind her head. Queen Leda: “Why are you here?” Zeus: “Why are you here…?” Zeus mumbled, eyes still fixed on his latest quarry. She napped her fingers in front of his nose. Queen Leda: “Get your stupid face out of my door.” Zeus wasn’t used to being barked at and jumped to attention, straight through the door and into the bedroom. The room was just as barren as the rest of the palace. The bed was a solid wooden affair with simple cotton sheets. The most beautiful part of the room were the long windows on the right side of the bed that led to a balcony that gave a nice view of the city’s roofs. Gauze curtains blew in the breeze and would be effective enough to hide just enough, but still reveal so much to anyone outside. Queen Leda: “You didn’t tell me why you’re here.” She picked up a green apple from a bowl and bit into it. She seemed completely unawed by the presence of the king of gods. She was, in fact, very unimpressed by the presence of the beer belly and moobs poking out of his toga. Zeus: “Well! I heard you were quite the beauty, so I came to, uh, investigate.” Queen Leda: “Oh. Is that all? Is this what the king of gods wastes his time doing?” Zeus frowned. Few spoke to him that way. Even his wife, Hera, who had immense dominance over him, would use honeyed words and deception to deal with him. This woman was blunt, arrogant and lacked any respect for his station. He had to admit, it was kind of a turn on. Zeus: “Time spent in pursuit of a beautiful woman is never wasted time.” He grinned a devilish grin. While he didn’t have the most attractive visage, his smirk was charming and cheeky. Many women he had plied his smile on would usually laugh at this, breaking the ice and opening up further flirtations. Queen Leda: “Then go and find one.” Zeus frowned in frustration but recomposed himself in an instant. Zeus: “Oh! But I already have! The lovely, lady L—ACK!” He had reached out to brush a strand of hair from her face but she caught it, like a viper, and in a quick twist he was tossed over her shoulder and slammed down to the cold, hard tiles. He groaned, dazed and confused. Then he grunted as she slammed and knee against his throat, his arm locked between her legs and arm. Queen Leda: “You are a fat, bumbling, frivolous excuse for a being. I wouldn’t squander even a second of my affections on you.” Zeus: “Now, that’s just mean!” He managed to choke out his words but then vanished from beneath her grasp. Her knee fell the foot distance to the ground with a thud. She felt the snap of a nerve that twanged in her leg but she ignored it. Spartans could feel pain, it was a good indicator of the body’s condition, but responding to the pain with wails and self-pity was disgraceful. She looked around. She knew he wouldn’t leave so easily. Her eyes met another man behind her. He was tall and built like a superhero – rippling muscles, square chin and chiselled cheekbones. He was naked and his exposed penis was as large as a horse. He stood with his hands on his hips with a broad, toothy grin. Queen Leda: “Now you look like Jupiter.” Zeus spluttered at the mention of his rival but, with his usual swiftness, masked against it. Zeus: “I am the very pinnacle of Spartan physique. You could no better than this—” He gestured to his body and genitals. Zeus: “I will make love to you for hours, you will never experience anything like it again. It will—” He reached out again but again she snapped his hand in a firm clutch of her palm. This time she yanked it up and forced him to fall to his knees and stamped on his back. She tugged on the arm, which caused him to whine like a baby. Queen Leda: “A real man spends years perfecting his body through discipline, hard work and courage. He doesn’t award himself the privilege of muscle or girth. You are a phony. A hack. A lame duck!” He vanished again and reappeared as his normal self. Zeus: “I don’t get it! I can be whatever you want me to be.” Queen Leda: “And maybe that’s the problem.” Zeus pouted but he knew this session was over. He bowed to the queen and left in a crack of lightning that fired through the open windows. Queen grunted. Queen Leda: “Gods. Useless. All of them.” Later that afternoon, the queen was in the garden. The neat rows of tomato plants were bursting with ripe, red fruit. The scent of sage and thyme was strong on the breeze. The apples were hanging heavily from the branches of the trees. Upon the small lake that spread out behind the palace were migrating birds that had settled in to the warm climes of Sparta. Ducks waggled along the water and geese honked at the edge of the lake. Strutting around the lawn were peacocks, the signature bird of Hera, and there were even lowly chickens pecking at the soil. This was the queen’s one guilty pleasure, a kinship with avians. They were strong creatures and tremendously hardy. To her they seemed otherworldly. They were not quite mammals, but nothing like the cold insects, fish or reptiles of the world. She sat on the grass and watched them until she noticed a newcomer to the garden. A large, proud swan that had spotted her bird haven and come to visit. His white feathers were well groomed and his large body appeared strong with nourishment. The bird cautiously went here and there through the flock of other birds. He snapped at a few ducks that got too close. But he drew nearer and nearer to the queen. The queen grew enthralled at this creature. It was so bold to dominate the birds around and was now brave enough to approach even a human. The tall, white beast stood before her. She reached out. Many would hesitate, afraid the bird would bite or even afraid they would scare him away. But not a Spartan. It was do or do not. Her fingers caressed his head and she felt such a warmth within her. She leaned in and cuddled the swan. Queen Leda: “You are a sneaky bastard.” Zeus-Swan: “Well, it got me a cuddle at least.” The swan chuckled and now, even Leda, proud Spartan queen, couldn’t help but laugh at Zeus’ tenacity. She ruffled his feathers. Queen Leda: “Well then, big boy.” She then, unexpectedly, slipped off her toga. Queen Leda: “Maybe I am enticed after all.” Zeus: “Wahoo! I knew I’d find the secret to your affections!” The swan started to move back, getting ready to transform back into human, but she tugged him between her legs and stared into his bird-eyes. Zeus: “You want me as the swan!?” Queen Leda: “Is it so strange? I heard you peed on a woman once.” Zeus: “It wasn’t p--! Why do I always find the weird ones?” The swan gave a swan-shrug. Zeus: “Not that I’m complaining! Geronimo!” --------- Seven years later, Queen Leda was practising her karate (not that its been invented yet) in the garden. The current generation of birds avoided the woman as she kicked and shouted across the lawn. From behind her came a small voice. Helen of Sparta: “So, mother, I was wondering…” Queen Leda: “Spartans don’t wonder. Leave that to the Athenians and their ‘academies’.” Helen of Sparta: “Where’s my father?” The queen stopped in the middle of a punch that would have choked a man if used on a living person. She struggled over how to tell her daughter. Queen Leda: “Uh… um… well… your father is Zeus. I had sex with him when he was a swan.” Helen stared at her mother with horror and confusion. Helen of Sparta: “Why in the hell would you tell me that!? Why didn’t you just make something up!? My father was Dave, the pizza delivery guy? Or my father was Benny, the milkman? Jeez!” Notes Britt's Commentary "Zeus' antics, and the general 'sexiness' of this post, are inspired by the posts of Al Ciao the Writer, especially when he writes about Highemperor's sexual escapades. The story itself is fairly based on the original story of LedaLeda (mythology) article, Wikipedia., particularly the sex with the swan." ~ Britt the Writer References External References Category:Post Category:Leg Post